singles ward survival guide!

It's that magical time again! Click here to listen to the new podcast entitled "Singles Ward Survival Guide" --> HERE!

For those of you not in the know about Singles Wards... here's a quick explanation. In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, we have wards. Wards are filled with people from a certain area, and they are assigned to a certain building, and a certain time for worship service. A SINGLES WARD is a ward for young single people between the ages of 18-31, because we're all in the same position in life... and also because they want us to date each other. The thing about Singles Wards is that sometimes, they're a little weird. So, Cody and I decided to make a "Singles Ward Survival Guide", which mostly consists of classifying everyone and telling you to avoid them. But, you know. So, listen up and figure out where you fit in the singles ward! And what you can do to not be one of these people!

CLASSIFICATIONS OF PEOPLE IN SINGLES WARDS WHO WE THINK ARE CRAZY

1. Sauron Girls: These are the girls in the ward who think only about the ring. They want that shiny bling on their finger, and they don't care who they steamroller over to get it. They will date anyone who crosses their path to get that 2 carat dream ring.

2. Premies: These are the little 18-19 year old boys who just got out of high school and are preparing to go on a mission. On their missions, they can't be kissing any ladies, so the Singles Ward is their playground. They want to find any girls they can to "fill the canteen".

i do not know this kid. google images.

3. Sour Patch Girls: These are the girls who are pretty jaded by love, and are "sour" toward dating. It's really too bad for them, because someone surely likes them. But they don't even bother anymore.

4. Soul Patch Guys: These are the guys who are getting a little old for the singles ward. They're having a mid-twenties identity crisis. They grow their soul patches in order to look cooler, and try to win the girls over. Silly soul patch guys.

i also do not know this guy.

5. Mission Plug Boys: These return missionaries cannot bring up anything in front of a crowd without mentioning their mission. We're happy they went on missions. But still.

i do know this guy. it's Cody!

6. The Question Marks: How old are these guys? You can't tell if they're a member of the bishopric, or if they're just soul patch guys without the soul patch. It's a confusing thing. Make it obvious, boys. Wear your age on your forehead for crying out loud!

like this guy. you never knew he was like 30 on hannah montana, did you?

7. The Self-Promoters: These are the girls who will lie to make something happen with a guy. It's like when a girl goes up and pretends she likes the same things as the guy, even if she has no clue what she's talking about. Be honest, ladies! You don't have to like EVERYTHING they do. In fact, you can tell them that if they want to take you on a hike, they should make it a short and easy one. If they like you enough, they won't mind.

i mean, right?

8. Overzealous: These are the boys who are the equivalent of the Sauron Girls. They will date anyone to get married. So, obviously, if you're a Sauron girl, you should find an Overzealous boy, and all of your problems will be solved.

9. The Players: These are the cutest boys in the ward that all the girls want, but the boys has no intention of ever dating anyone, even though they take out multiple girls in a week.

it's just... so dramatic. how could I not?

10. Little Engines That Could: These are the boys who are like Players, but it's only because every time they ask a girl out, they are rejected. And yet, they still persevere and ask girls out and have faith! Keep on keepin' on, boys!

OTHER THINGS TO NOTE

Don't date your home teacher.

Girls, don't ask guys out unless it's a desperate situation. Just do your job and look pretty.

And finally, don't bother just getting married without dating. You need to date the person to learn all about them! Put in the effort!

And that's all for today, folks. Catch ya later. Feel free to "like" our Facebook page, DW Datecast feat. Madeline, follow us on Twitter @DWDatecast, and follow this blog! Go ahead and comment and tweet us with ideas you would like us to talk about on the podcast. We love your input! Thanks everyone!

get over it, fools!

Hey everyone! Sorry I haven't been very attentive to this lovely blog. I just happened to take a vacation to England for 10 days! Lucky me! Anyway, here is the newest episode of datecast -----> click here!

And here is the blog post I wrote on my personal blog, P.S. My Name Is Madeline that inspired the datecast! If you want to hear more, you should listen to the podcast, if you don't have time to listen, this should suffice. Stay pretty, Salt Lake City! And hey, ask someone on a date!

A question I get most often from my friends is, "How do you get over boys?" And sometimes I feel like I'm the worst person in the world to ask. Because frankly, it doesn't take me that long. 

Haha... that sounded heartless.... but look at it this way. I date boys, and so far, it hasn't worked out. This doesn't mean it will NEVER work out, it just means that it hasn't yet. It is so so easy to fall into the trap of, "I date so many boys, and none of them work out! Maybe something is wrong with me???" 

That's wrong. The truth of the matter is, not every single boy you date (or girl, if you are a boy who is reading this...) is going to be THE ONE. In fact, you'd better hope not all of them are, because that would be super duper stressful. 

The reason that we date people is to LEARN something. I can look back at each of my relationships and say this worked, and this definitely did not. And with this knowledge, I approach a new relationship stronger and smarter than before. 

It's hard, really hard, to have a break up with somebody. You're used to them around. They text you, call you, cuddle with you, kiss you, make you feel special... and suddenly they are gone. You don't have the "we" factor anymore. If there is one thing I make sure to stress to my friends who ask me about break-ups, I tell them that they need some time by themselves. Being with your boyfriend (or girlfriend) becomes so normal and comfortable, that you forget how to be alone. How to be by yourself, just you, no one else. 

Another thing that I don't do is wallow. I just don't. I don't want to. I just can't be that person who crawls into bed and cries for days on end over what could have been. I definitely cry, but there is a moment when the tears have just got to stop... time to move on.

 I don't want to be the person who says, "remember that time when we did this and it was so so perfect and I thought maybe we would be together forever??" I want to be the person who says, "I remember that time, things were really good, and I was happy. But I also remember that time that things weren't so great, and I would like to not go through that again." 

I have to look at both sides of the story. If you get stuck remembering the good times, you won't learn what you're supposed to from the relationship.

And lastly, I look forward to the future. Every time I have a break up, I can't help but be weirdly excited for the next boy to come along. Like, "oh! That didn't work out this time, which means...*excited pause* something even better is around the corner!!!!" 

Because it is! Something better is always coming. 

So I jump right back into life, full speed ahead. That's the easiest way for me to get over it, is just living in the present and looking forward to the future instead of dwelling in the past. 

So there you have it (even if you didn't ask for it), my steps to getting over a boy (or girl??).

To recap:

1: Learn to be yourself again.

2: Focus on the whole picture.

3: Look forward to the future.

4: Take the lesson you were meant to learn, and use it!

in a relationship, you shouldn't be selfish

This is the newest episode of Datecast! ---> HOW TO HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP

In this most recent episode, Cody and I talk about relationships, and how to have a good one. Since I obviously am at that point in my life where I need to talk about this... it made the most sense. (so, don't take this next weekend's topic personally, Alex... it is what it is.)

Date Recap:

I'm the only one who had a date! Again! Is it just me, or is Cody slacking off? Alex came up and visited me at work. It was really nice of him! He had to drive an hour and a half! We watched fireworks for Utah's holiday Pioneer Day, and then just sat and talked for a while. It was so nice to have some down time! Cody makes some jokes about how I invited my friends on the date with me... and that our first date as a couple was a double date. What really happened was that my friend Kjarinda (Ka-Rin-Da) wanted to go watch the fireworks with her boy, and we decided to do that together! But they left when the fireworks were over. So we really had a lot of time to ourselves. And honestly, I don't remember ever specifying that it was a date. So. It was still fun.

And then... one that we didn't talk about! I got to take Alex with me to the RIDICULOUSLY AMAZING THEME PARK CALLED LAGOON! (It's average at best.) We rode a few rides and hung out with my sisters and friends (which, I'm sure, Cody would not approve of.) But it ended up being a good time. It's always good to spend time together!

Date Debate:

We decided to talk about how to have a good relationship. How to be a good girlfriend/boyfriend kind of deal. We talk about a lot of things, and honestly, this date debate is one of our better ones. The most important points that we discussed were that relationships require you to not be SELFISH! And to treat the other person how you would like to be treated. I don't know... just listen to it.

Also, something that's really fun to do is take the 5 Love Languages Quiz! (you can click on that) This quiz shows how you give and receive love, and if you know that, you should have minimal problems keeping your relationship going. So. Go forth and do.

Take someone on a date! (That means you, Cody)

a podcast and date recap and some all caps kind of sentences

Hey there peeps! (ew, did I really  just say that? oh well. I'm leaving it.) I haven't blogged in a while. My bad. Or probably Cody's bad. Why am I the only one who blogs, anyway? Is it because I'm a girl? How sexist are we?

Here is the most recent podcast... as of like, a week ago. (sorry sorry sorry! But honestly, if you "like" our facebook page, you don't have to worry about waiting such a long time for them! Just throwing that out there!) Click here --> PODCAST!!!!!! (that was for you, grandma and grandpa. p.s. if you click the BOYS TALK ABOUT FLIRTING you can get to the other one. sorry for the no arrow confusion... arrows from now on!)

The latest podcast featured a guest podcaster who was none other than WEDNESDAY NIGHT GIRL herself! Brook Adkins! Basically, she comes on the show and refutes everything Cody has ever said about her, which I thought was pretty awesome. I want you guys to listen to it, so I'm only going to tell you my favorite part, and then I'm going to talk about me! (ha!) Remember that story where Cody, under his breath, asked Brooke out, and she kept talking and didn't acknowledge it at all? We decided that she probably didn't hear him, and gave her the benefit of the doubt. Only it turns out that she DID hear him, and ignored him because she was in the middle of a sentence, and she thinks "what are you doing this weekend" is the worst question in the world. But she did want him to try to ask her out again... so it's too bad he gave up on her and she got an old man boyfriend. Oh, the horror!

In other news, all about me, and my dating life that is cool, would you like to hear a date recap? Everyone say "yes"!

The gist of the thing is this - picnic, chocolate covered strawberries, bridge, bench, and sunset + random fireworks on a mountain. oh, and then The Dark Knight Rises because... duh.

Samples of Conversations on a Date Recap

Alex: I was trying to think of food that you have on picnics, like when we were little? So I brought Sunny D.

Madeline: Yeah, that's a no brainer.

Alex: I'm actually allergic to bees, but I don't know what will happen when I get stung.  You may have to take me to the hospital.

Madeline: Really? Can we test it out?

Madeline: I was debating on wether to wear nice shoes or hiking shoes. I almost wore nice shoes, because I didn't really feel like hiking. But I settled on Toms.

Alex: Last time you wore those, you fell down.

Madeline: Exactly. So, maybe we shouldn't hike.

Alex: It's short, we'll just go to a bridge!

Madeline: (Standing on road) Is this the bridge?

Alex: Right here?

Madeline: Yes.

Alex: ... No.

Madeline: Oh, this bridge is actually kind of cool! There is a little river! People's initials are carved in it!  A cafe rio cup is in the water!

Alex: Oh, that was probably from Cody. The birds will make a nest from it!

Alex: Let's race sticks down the river. You have to be really careful which stick you choose, it needs to be really aerodynamic.

Madeline: (breaks stick off branch.) Let's go.

(They drop the sticks off the bridge, Madeline's gets stuck on a rock. Alex's disappears.)

Alex: Ohhhhh... there are too many sticks and rocks for them to get through. It's a dam.

Madeline: I think I won.

Alex: Do you want to go out with me?

Madeline: Where?

Alex: ...To the zoo.

Madeline: Umm....

Alex: No, like go out, like dating...

Madeline: Oh, so like, me and you? You and me? No one else? 

Alex: ... yeah...

Madeline: Sure.

And that's your date recap in some snippets of conversation. Boring? Haters back off.

this is what the boys said...

Here are the boys answers to my flirting questions, and their own take on flirting! It's quite hilarious!

BOYS TALK ABOUT FLIRTING

In this episode, you get to hear sweet nothings from Cody's best friends: Alex, Riley, and Luke. Yeah, guys, I know, that's the Alex that I've been going on dates with. They start out by introducing them, blah blah blah. Alex gives a date recap, so I feel like I don't have to! He says that we went to a drive in movie, but there was no canoodling like Cody was hoping, although we did hold hands. This is all true!   Way to go, Alex! 

Afterwords, Cody brags about himself for a bit, but Alex sets the record straight, pointing out that Cody is in fact, NOT 6'3" and 210lbs. So. That's embarrassing Cody. You're like, one of those online people who lies about everything. Just kidding everyone, he only fibbed a bit. He's pretty normal. 

So, they read my blog. Cody agrees that flirting should come naturally, and Alex points out that it's a lot easier to flirt with people you don't like! I agree. Cody reads something that he sent to Wednesday Night Girl to ask her to podcast with him this week. (Are you guys so excited? Wednesday Night Girl! An actual love interest of Cody's! She'll be talking to you all!) Riley talks about lowering the stakes to make himself more comfortable with flirting. Love that, Riley! Flirting does not mean commitment! Luke says he doesn't get nervous until he gets to know people more. This is semi-normal, I guess... Cody agrees that there is more at stake. Everyone agrees that confidence is really attractive! You guys, seriously, all you need is a smile and some eye contact, and you can get someone a little interested. They all laugh as quietly as possible, and have a hard time talking. I can only imagine how this was going down in Cody's basement...

So, answers to questions.

1. Cody notices that he just answered this question! Do boys respond to confidence in the same way girls do? The answer is obviously, yes. Cody then brags to Alex about having a better relationship with me than he does. Much taunting laughter at this jibe.

2. What makes you feel comfortable enough around a girl to flirt with her? Alex says when girls give him good signals, he feels comfortable. Cody agrees. Riley likes it when girls start up conversations. Cody talks about a girl who flirts with him by bringing up deaths. Luke things there should be attraction already, that way, he knows he likes her and he goes after it! Luke, you are so brave! Love it. Riley thinks you should keep flirting if you like a girl, Cody really likes that. Alex taunts Luke about a girl named Alexis who he used to like. Luke defends himself by saying he doesn't like her anymore. Much boyish sniggering behind the microphones. They blow each others noses.

3. What makes you think that a girl is flirting with you? (I thought this question was hilarious. As if girls are ever really flirting with them...) Riley likes it when girls bring up things like, "we should go boating sometime!" Cody labels that "probing". Alex agrees that "call back" is important. When girls remember what you have said before, that's good. Luke thinks what I said about eye contact is good! Thanks Luke! My mom told me to say that. Ha ha. Jk. Cody thinks it's easier to tell when girls aren't flirting with you. That's because they never are... as I mentioned before. (Sorry, is this getting mean? You know I don't mean it.)

4. What do you consider flirtatious? Yes that is a real word. Riley is all about light-heartedness, physical contact like soft brushes of the arm... Cody misquotes me by saying that I basically run into people on purpose to flirt. This is untrue. 

5. What can girls say to get you more interested? Cody thinks when girls joke about kissing they are flirting. Cody, Cody, Cody. Luke doesn't like super forward girls, but still finds it flattering. Cody likes forwardness. Riley thinks compliments and opportunities to hang out are good. Cody likes when girls pretend to like what he likes. (They're desperate, Cody). Alex thinks nothing. When he likes a girl, he likes her. This is good information to know? yeahhhhh. Riley needs more time to decide if he likes someone. Alex is the type to observe them from a distance and then get to know them. It's all good, I'm used to people spying on me.... ha. 

so, you know, POST YOUR COMMENTS ON FLIRTING! FOLLOW THE BLOG! FOLLOW ON TWITTER! LIKE ON FACEBOOK! 

We love dating. So if you date, we love you. Yeah, we dropped the "L" word on ya. 

They also role play... talking about androgynous names and flirting with each other. It's like... pretty good. I guess you'll just have to listen to it. Enjoy!

Just FYI. Flirting 101.

Hey everyone! Today's post is kind of cool, because Cody is going to be podcasting at the SAME TIME that I am posting this. This is happening because on Saturday I sped all the way home to podcast with him, and then the computer deleted every amazing thing I said, and I had to go to my other job. So. Without further ado...


This podcast is about FLIRTING!


(I'll do a date recap later.)


Good ole Wikipedia said flirting is "a sexual activity involving verbal or written communication as well as body language by one person to another, suggesting an interest in a deeper relationship with the other person." So, that's cool.


For me, body language is the most important part. My love language is Quality Time, (we will podcast about that another day!) so I think that's why body language would matter to me. The proximity of the person is really important. When I am flirting with someone, I am usually close to them in some way. Standing close, arms touching, whatever. I think in person flirting is a lot easier than over text or Facebook or what have you... mostly because of one thing. Eye Contact. It's so much easier to connect with someone if you can look into their eyes. Especially if you can't be standing close to them with your arms touching. You see your guy over there talking to some other girl? Catch his eye, and look away. BAM. Love connection. 


Ha ha, just kidding. What do I really know about flirting? If you ask me, flirting is just something that happens naturally. It is not a conscious effort that I make to stand closer to someone. My roommates used to always tease me because I would unconsciously slide closer and closer to the person I liked on the couch. You know, start on one end, end up right next to him? But I didn't mean to. Naturally we are just attracted to people, and we flirt with them. So, my advice is to not think about it. Put yourself in the other person's area or space, and let it come naturally from there. Make eye contact! Be yourself. You can't feel confident in someone you don't know, so don't act like someone different. Girls respond to confidence, and I'm sure it's the same for boys?


Speaking of which, hey boys! (There are some boys podcasting with cody today on a sort of "panel" if you will.) So here are some questions.


1. Do boys respond to confidence just like girls? 
2. What makes you feel comfortable enough around a girl to flirt with her?
3. What makes you think that a girl is flirting with you?
4. What kinds of things to you consider "flirtatious"?
5. What kinds of flirtatious things can girls say to you to get you even more interested? ha ha.


So there you have it! When the boys have spoken, I will post the podcast on this blog. Leave comments about flirting! What do you think about it? How does it really work?


Now go, ask someone out! Hold their hand, because that's always fun. ;)

Stalkers! Bad Dates! Flirting Fails!

Click this for Podcast --> PODCAST!

Alrighty! Time for a recap of our latest podcast. This episode was actually recorded quite a few weeks ago, but our second half interview segment bailed on us which was so totally lame. (I mean, really.) So Cody finally found a chance to use the first half, and that was when I was gone! To make it seem like I was really there! Only it may have been confusing to some of you, who were sure that my next date recap would be about Alex and not some ridiculously boring person... but there you have it. Those were the days of early summer. So, let's recap this thing.

My date with Spencer.

It was alright. It was a blind date, set up by my little sister who thinks I'm a dating failure. (You wait, Olivia. I haven't hit my peak yet. But it is coming! Oh, it is coming.) So, he picked me up, told me that being an Elementary School Teacher was lame (basically...), and drove me to a little place we like to call Boondocks. A.K.A. dumbfamilyfuncenterthathasbadfoodandstuff. We ate pizza, talked about music, and then played arcade games. This was all... fine. But what was annoying was the fact that he wasn't ok with me winning ANYTHING. Now, I'm not a competitive person, but it is a little annoying when someone won't even have the grace to congratulate me on doing well on something. Instead of saying, "Oh, ha ha, I let you do that." ExCUSE me, but no you didn't, mister. I mean, me scoring an extra point in air hockey isn't the end of the world. So, that was that, and we went home, and I decided to never see him again.

Cody's story from this week revolved around him choking when trying to ask Wednesday Night Girl Out. Speaking of which... you'll be hearing from Wednesday Night Girl herself someday in the near future! Get excited! Basically, they have a class together on Wednesday night, and Cody sits next to her and compliments her. They talk and flirt up a storm. And then while packing up to leave class, Wednesday Night Girl is talk talk talking away and Cody blurts out, (in a whisper) (can you blurt in a whisper?) (well, he did.) "What are you doing this weekend?" And Wednesday Night Girl either did not hear him, or decided to ignore it... the jury is still out on that one. But I say didn't hear it!

After our date recaps and flirting fails, we talked about Stalkers!!! Stalkers, in my opinion, are people who are "emotionally invested in something that hasn't happened yet." So, the best way to not be a stalker is to observe signals, and keep control of yourself! Come on, people! Cody's advice to girls on how to help a boy not become a stalker (a.k.a. reject them kindly) comes in three steps.

1. Tell them, "No thanks, why don't you ask someone else?" When asked on a date you don't want to go on.

2. If they try again, say, "I don't like you that way."

3. If they try one more time, say, "Get away from me, you creepy head!" (Or something like that? I forget how Cody words things sometimes.) 

Basically ladies, be honest! And boys, read signals! 

In fact, EVERYONE read signals!! DUH!

podcasting tomorrow! Get ready!